to weed or not to weed

Just as an aside, do you ever feel really stupid and embarrassed. Like if you could take back something (or a whole bunch of things) you said or did and instead be ultra smooth, polished and classy instead of fumbling and ridiculous you maybe would?

Anyway, to the post.

To begin, I hate gardening. To be more precise, I hate bugs and other crawly things. And gardening = bugs.

So, my new place has a yard. And that yard is made up of two parts. A garden with some flowers and a lawn of weeds. No, not a lawn of grass, weeds. Think about a nice warm summer day and getting the urge to lie on a verdant bed of sweet smelling, soft grass. Instead, your option is a prickly field of dandelions and thistle. But the war has begun and I shall continue to wage it as best I can. Last night I went and filled a up a jerrycan for the first time in my life and brought it back to my house to get my new old lawnmower set to go. I mowed the weeds and the wee bit of grass in between them. Then I started pulling the big patches out with my weed/hoe/thingy. Disgusting find number 1 - two cockroaches doing it under a mushroom. Blech. There was no way I was touching them so I went to find aid in removing the two lovebirds from my property. They must have already found something a little more private by the time I was back because I couldn't find them. That means more baby cockroaches later. It is almost enough to make me sell my house and move into a condo immediately.

I finished weeding that area (careful to move aside all foilage to check what might be under it before pulling) and then moved to the garden. Some of those dandelions were 3 feet high! I think I may have accidentally pulled out a bunch of real flowers that weren't weeds. Oops. Anyways, I have a ridiculously irrational fear of spiders. I saw at least 6 different species in that garden. I was honestly scared to be in there the whole time. Yes, I know I have a problem. I will not deny that feeling terrified that while walking in my garden a creature 1/100,000th of my weight might get me is a little ridiculous. I can't help it. The terror is real.

By this time the sun was starting to go down. I'd seen too many bugs and mosquitoes and too much copulation to really feel like doing more gardening so I grabbed my bottle of weed spray (this was the part I'd been looking forward to) and used the whole thing on my lawn. I also kept hoping/wondering whether or not weed killer might possibly kill cockroaches and spiders too. Sadly, I doubt it. I seem to remember talking about how pesticides work in my plant science class. It might give them cancer, but it wouldn't immediately kill them.

So here's to hoping that the first battle in my war on weeds has made some headway. According to the bottle of Killex, I'll be able to let you know in 3-4 days.